This is exactly how I remember it……..
Malia: Do you love me?
MJ: On Tuesdays.
Malia: It looks like we will only be having sex on Tuesdays then. You screwed that up for yourself.
MJ: The truth is, I am afraid to tell you how much I really love you because I don’t want to scare you away.
Malia: You won’t.
MJ: I have a love test for you. I want to see if you will quit on me.
Malia: Bring it white boy!
MJ: There is a tropical storm headed for Houston. We are going to drive towards Houston, and when you get scared, tell me and we will turn around.
Malia: Baby, you are the one who is afraid. I know you were hurt by Mrs Wrong in the past. I am Mrs Right and I am ride or die!
MJ: I believe you. This was a crazy idea.
Malia: I will meet you at the car in 15 minutes.
MJ: Baby, I would rather not do this. I think it would hurt me to hear you tell me to turn around. I know that is unfair, but I love you so much that I don’t want to feel rejected by you at all.
Malia: I’m in the mood for seafood when we get to Houston. How about we eat at the Aquarium restaurant when we get to there?
MJ: I love that place! They have a freakin aquarium inside the restaurant.
Malia: I am going to be the one who will scare you on this road trip.
MJ: Yeah right. Alright, let’s do this.
Malia: If we die, we die together. You are my life. I can’t live without you. I might get scared, but I know you won’t let anything bad happen to me.
MJ: Malia, I love you more than anything. I would die for you. I wanna marry you. I wanna have babies with you!
Malia: Baby, is that what you were afraid to tell me because you were afraid it would scare me away?
Malia: I want that too. I love you more than anything. I am willing to die in a tropical storm to prove it. I want to marry you too. I want to have your babies. Is it going to scare you off when I don’t say turn the car around no matter what happens?
MJ: Yes, because I didn’t think anyone could ever love me that much.
Malia: What if I scare you away?
MJ: Not going to happen.
Malia: Are you going to quit on me Johnson?
Side note: I got down on one knee and pulled my Great Grandma Grace’s ring out of my pocket.
MJ: Malia, I need you. I was going to wait until we got to Houston to ask you, but I don’t want to risk you not knowing how much I love you in case something happens to us on the way to Houston.
Malia: Wait, what? I thought this was a test. You knew I would never tell you to turn the car around. You were setting me up to propose to me, but you couldn’t do it because you didn’t want to risk me not knowing how much you love me in case we die on our game of chicken with the tropical storm?
MJ: Yep. Do you still want to go to Houston?
Malia: Yes! I am starving. I have a fiancé now. I want to celebrate that, and I am in the mood to have some hot like wasabi tropical storm sex for the first time ever as an engaged couple. I am so happy even though I am about to die in a tropical storm.
Side note: We drove to Houston but the Aquarium restaurant was shutting down right when we got there. As it turns out, Houston was being evacuated. We told our story to the security guy outside the restaurant. He said- “Congratulations. I am happy for the both of you. You proved you love each other. You deserve to be together. Don’t die in this damn hurricane. Get back in your car and go back home. You might could drive to San Antonio. You should be safe there. San Antonio is a fun ass city.”
The picture on this post was a selfie we took outside of the Aquarium restaurant with the wind blowing us around like crazy. And we did have a “fun ass” time in San Antonio that night.
The Letter I Wrote To My Future Father and Mother In Law – https://www.mjtheterrible.com/the-letter-i-wrote-to-my-future-father-and-mother-in-law/