This random picture of my former court appointed supervisor, and my family’s current head of security, Brittany White, aka “Dubs”, led to some funny comments from people who know her.
I thought it was funny how they all pretty much thought the exact same thing. I did too.
Chris Hubbard: I hate Chris and MJ. They always tease me about having a penis. Well, I don’t have penis! I have a mangina. It makes me kind of like a man, but I can pee in the women’s bathroom.
Marcus Jennings: I was that assholes court appointed supervisor for years and I still have to take care of him. There would be no “MJ The Terrible” without me. I am the man! I mean woman. You know what I mean. I am a woman damn it! I am. I swear!
Tarica Patel Hubbard: What is MJ going to do today to piss me off? I can’t take it anymore! Ahhh!!!!
Big J. Kosta: I see you taking a picture of me MJ. I see everything! I am the one and only Dubs, and you better never forget it!
Kevin: How the fuck did Mr. Stuxnet, Mr. Almost World War 3 starter, Mr. MJ The Terrible himself, become an American hero and land Malia? This world is so unfair! That lucky bastard!
Kristi Jennings aka Kristi Ihaveonenamelikemadonnabitch: Yeah. I’m Brittany White. My nicknames are The Lioness and Dubs. I kicked MJ the Terrible’s ass. I’m a badass!
Matthew McConaughey: I’ve got my hair up in a bun of fury and I have my Terminator 2 sunglasses on. You better not start shit today MJ!
Matthew McConaughey: I popped over to see my boy on lockdown today, Mr Bigtime Chris Hubbard. Momma Johnson makes the rowdiest chocolate chip cookies! I ate about 4, 5, or 15 of them while I was there. After I left, I came back around the corner to get a doggie bag to take home with me. Your 92 year old Grandmother thought I was Burt Reynolds, but I ain’t mad at cha Grandmother The Terrible. Keep on ventilating along with your bad self. I miss ya MJ. Thanks for letting us stay at your condo in dt ATX. The view is amazing at sunset and sunrise. Give me a shout. Let’s try to hang out soon.
Pete Dowdle (Mr. Pete): How was I safer as a CIA field agent on dangerous missions than I am guarding 1 friggin man? Nothing ever happened to me when I was a CIA field agent. Guarding MJ, I have been stabbed, I had to fight an anaconda, I had to fight MJ, and lots of other stuff too. This is bull shit!
Lebron James: Brittany. That’s my girl right there. I remember movie night at MJ’s crib with Brittany, Malia, and MJ. It was fun. But on the real though, I think Brittany is thinking sweet thoughts, about kicking MJ’s skinny white ass. Much love White Mike Johnson!!
Eric Fanning: We need a Royce City Walmart parking lot rematch. I will beat MJ’s ass in the rematch too. Dubs will remain undefeated!
Malia: I feel bad for Brittany. Everyone is teasing her. I think she was probably thinking good thoughts.
Brittany White (Dubs): I don’t know what I was thinking about then, but now I am thinking y’all can kiss my ass. I know you wouldn’t tease me if you didn’t care. I look at y’all like family. I know you feel the same deep down.
MJ: Brittany, you are right. I tease. We tease. But in all seriousness, I trust you with my life and more importantly the lives of Malia and our babies. You might, and I’m saying “might” have a penis, but we absolutely love you either way no matter what!
P.S. We really do care about you. Like you said, we’re family. Me Familia la Brittannia!!!
Anything Goes Q&A With Brittany White – https://www.mjtheterrible.com/anything-goes-qa-with-brittany-white/