Malia: Do you remember taking this photo you dirty perv?
MJ: Uh huh. You blurred the bejesus out of that pic.
Malia: You just agreed to being a dirty perv. And I don’t want anyone seeing what’s under the blurred parts but you.
MJ: I’m allowed to be a dirty perv.
Malia: When is it ok to be a dirty perv?
MJ: I have a license to perv. It makes it completely legal to perv on you anytime I want to.
Malia: By license to perv, do you mean our marriage license?
MJ: Yeah. I think something about perving is okay was in our wedding vows now that I think about it.
Malia: No, it was not, but out of pure curiosity, can you recite our wedding vows? I realize you may not remember them word for word.
MJ: You have the right to be married. Anything you say can and will be used against you. And ye shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free. You have the right to be a perv. Love her always, and love her more when she is pmsing, because if you don’t, Maliacane. Love on her for better or for worse, until death does us part. So help me God. Boom! You’re married!
Malia: Were we at the same wedding, because I don’t remember our vows having the Miranda rights, or CIA’s motto, or the right to perv, and I don’t remember the part about love her more when she is pmsing, because if you don’t, Maliacane, but that is a good vow. Baby, you are ridiculous! You live in alternate reality world!
Malia: Did you marry me so you could dirty perv on me?
MJ: That is not the only reason. I wanted to marry you because you are my best friend, I wanted to have babies with you, lots of other reasons, my mom loved you, my family and friends loved you, and yes, I wanted to dirty perv on you, for lack of other better words.
Malia: I dirty perv on you too. Did you ever think about that?
MJ: I think that’s hot.
Malia: I think it’s hot that you dirty perv on me too.
Malia: Wanna come play with my under the blurred out parts, but still no vagine penetration yet. One more month still for that.
MJ: So you want me to come dirty perv on your parts?
Malia: Only if I can perv on your parts.
MJ: Absolutely! I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Malia: I’m perving on you. You’re perving on me. We’re perving on we.
MJ: I’m a lucky mofo.
MJ: Because I get to see, feel, kiss, touch, lick, suck, and otherwise enjoy what’s under the blurred out parts.
Malia: Yeah Daddy. Come kiss lick and suck some stuff.
MJ: O T Dubs
Malia: Do you know where to come to?
MJ: I can see you in the window. I’m otw to our bedroom.
Building Licker! – https://www.mjtheterrible.com/building-licker/